Texty: Various Artists. The Ballad Of Tom Jones.

[Key: T-Tommy (Space), C-Cerys, CT-Both]
T - What did I do wrong?
C - Oh, you nearly drove me cuckoo
T - I am really all that bad?
C - You're worse than Hannibal Lecter, Charlie Manson, Freddy Krueger
T - Why are we still together?
C - Oh, I can't leave you till you're dead
T - You mean till death do us part
C - I mean like cyanide, strangulation or an axe through your head
T - It was lucky for us I turned the radio on
C - They say that music soothes the savage beast
T - There was something in that voice that stopped us seeing red
CT - The two of us would've surely have ended up dead
[chorus]
CT - You stopped us from killing each other (Tom Jones, Tom Jones)
CT - You'll never know but you saved our lives (Tom Jones, Tom Jones)
C - I've never thrown my knickers at you
T - And I don't come from wales
T - Still haven't solved our problems
C - You mean we hate each other's guts
T - Still want to poison your pizza
C - And I still want to cut off your nads
T - I've phoned the marriage guidance
C - I've tied the phone-line round your neck

T - I'm sick of all this hatred
C - Oh, that'll be the arsenic making you sick
T - You were about to drive me over the edge of a cliff
C - As I tried to jump out I knocked the stereo on
T - You changed your mind and then slammed on the brakes
CT - It was lucky for us we bought his greatest hits
[chorus]
C - And now our war is over
T - I've lost the urge to break your neck
C - I owe my life to What's New Pussycat
T - Delilah stopped me hating you and wishing you're dead
C - Oh, I used to call Satan
T - I called you Cruella de Ville
C - But now you call me your Delilah
T - And now i'm not your Lucifer
C - And I am just a pussycat
T - But just a word of warning now
C - Just in case we ever get tired of his voice
T - I know the Mafia, Godzilla, King Kong
C - And I know an atom bomb that's going for a song
[chorus] x2